Sister of Hairshirt

Catching Up!

2009-07-01T19:33:00.015-04:00

Here ya go, Riley fans! A quick look back at the last five months or so!

Riley dresses up and gets stoned for the Obama inauguration...

Mmmmm, Easter Candy!

Do you think Kenny G started this way?

New York City 2009!

Riley watches Grandpa Wack calculate the tip!

Enjoying the Natural History Museum!

Earning frequent flyer miles on the subway with veteran traveller cousin Spencer!

Riley is fascinated by our patched together, but comfortable hotel room...

And decided to visit grandma and pappaw in their cozy loft bed!

No, I want to kiss her first!

Grandpa's retirement dinner at the Central Park Boathouse...Mommy and Uncle Joe's debit cards are still smoking!

Phew! I'll post more in a few hours!

Is There Lead in Chinese Food Coloring?

2009-03-20T02:20:00.003-04:00

Ah, the joys of holidays featuring green frosting....

Adorable, yes?

By Special Request...the Hair Show

2009-03-04T16:27:00.004-05:00

Nothing is Sacred

2009-02-28T14:52:00.003-05:00

Artistic Differences

2009-01-29T11:31:00.002-05:00

"I disagree with my learned cousin Spencer...I prefer Matisse's later works. That's all I have to say!"

New Pics

2009-01-21T20:09:00.006-05:00

Instead of waxing poetic about the inauguration (sorry, guys, but Top Chef is on tonight), I'll just briefly say "awesome"! And here are some photos and a video of Riley...if I can get this to work right...

Too Tired For Murder

2008-12-11T01:59:00.004-05:00

If my mother reads this post, she will like the title...it was the title of one of the murder mysteries she wrote...a Christmas homage to you, Muz.

But, it also describes my state of mind right now. Too tired to bother to kill the ex...who has dropped hints that he would come back if I wanted him...HAH! When hell freezes over, buddy! That is, unless you and your penis get your heads on straight. Which will never happen.

Unfortunately, however, I am also too busy (tired) to try to look for someone new. My plentyoffish.com profile has had no messages for me since I edited a couple weeks ago...maybe I shouldn't have said the following...
"You guessed it, boys and girls, Riley's Daddy and myself have split up. I did everything I could, but here I am single again...mostly looking for people to talk to or hang with between my busy work schedule and raising my beautiful son...but, if I happen to meet a great guy, I would not be opposed to a long-term relationship in the future.Here's what I DON'T want...no morons, no druggies, no leaches, no cheaters, no man who hasn't "found himself yet", and, definitely, no man who thinks Paris Hilton is "hot".What I DO want...a good sense of humor (no, the damn Blue Collar Comedy Tour guys do not count), a good paying job (I'm not supporting anyone but myself and my child), a minimum of baggage (kids are fine but not five kids to five different women), some college education would be nice (if for no other reason than we would have more to talk about), at least a decent ability to put an outfit together (please, no acid wash jeans from the late 80s), no one who hangs out in bars constantly (I work in one, I get tired of it), at least a passing interest in politics and world affairs (again, the stuff we could talk about), and, obviously, since I have a child...you must at least have patience with...and general affection for...children.P.S. I changed my status to single because I've been divorced for 17 years and figured it was silly to call myself divorced after that long. (Riley's father and myself were not married). Also, there was no option for smoker who plans to quit soon, so I cheated and put "occasionally." So sue me.I like...James Bond movies, Anne Rice novels (her early stuff), kissing for an hour, going out to dinner, spreading a quilt on the floor and watching DVDs with my guy, watching my baby boy do ANYTHING, Buffy the Vampire Slayer reruns, posting occasionally on my blog, drinking Corona, and many other things I don't currently have time for."

Now, guys...in my mind, this is not too picky, not too bitter, and not too fucking much to ask! Alas, I guess I could use some feedback because this profile hasn't seen any action...lol...which means Mommy won't see any action either.

Funny thing is, this wasn't what I planned to post tonight, but it filled up the space nicely, don't you think?

Canonize Me, Already

2008-11-14T01:27:00.004-05:00

Ok...have mild buzz. Had my usual two beers at the end of my extremely stressful Thursday night shift and arrived home about 1:20 a.m. to relieve my poor mother of babysitting duty, which, when I'm bartending late, is a long night. Mike The Dipshit Ex Who Just Left Me for Bimbo at Work (lmao) asked me to call him when I got home because he needs to get the rest of his shit out of the garage and, share the laugh with me, folks, has to do it before tomorrow because his vehicle has to be returned to Wally Armour's budget lot, as he is unable to make the payment...(taking moment to double up in laughter).

When Mike the Dipshit arrived to remove more of his useless crap, I indulged myself in two amarettos on ice to ease my tension about my son's early morning departure to New York *sigh* because I can't afford to take the weekend off to go with my parents and my baby boy is going with grandma and grandpa. And, I have no idea how I am going to sleep in this empty house without my baby. To comfort myself, I once again indulged myself, this time in some sarcasm at my ex's expense...pure joy. However, I reassured him that I have no intention of keeping his son from him and that he can watch Riley the night before Thanksgiving because I have to work late and he is welcome to watch him and bring Shiana, my up-until-recently step-daughter who still calls me "mommy."

Considering Mike's penchant for breeding then leaving, and considering the huge sum of money he owes my parents ($3,000 plus), and considering the fact he had an affair with aforementioned bimbo, and considering the fact he didn't feel it necessary to marry me, and considering the fact I housed and fed two more his five children, and considering the fact he smoked dope and concealed it from me, and considering the fact that he went to those cash advance places without telling me and ran up considerable debt where I have no idea where the money went, and considering the fact I paid every bill for the household...*breathe*...I think I'm being rather fucking saintly...saying I want to be friends and get along...babysitting Shiana on Wednesday's...giving him back the cell phone I pay for so I could get him in an emergency...

Mother Theresa...take a back seat, baby! I'm after your title!

That's only half the crappy story...but am sick of typing.

Equal Time

2008-11-13T01:09:00.004-05:00

It occurs to me that I should post more pics of by beautiful son...since my nephew Spencer has his own blog at three weeks old...lol. I think maybe I would blog more if I made it about Riley...so here's the beginning of more child-centric posts. Maybe this weekend, while he is visiting his "city cousin" Spencer in New York...mommy will catch up on current events and post some relevant stuff...didn't we just elect a new president? Some big deal for some reason wasn't it? First guy who plays basketball? No. First guy who loves his wife? No, that wasn't it...oh, well, I'll remember sooner or later.

Hoo-fuckin'-ray!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-11-05T00:38:00.003-05:00

Even the most cynical person in America, tonight of all nights, if they watched the election coverage and Obama's amazing acceptance speech...would feel like a child again! A hopeful, idealistic child full of wonderment and confidence in our future. I almost feel as sense of historical destiny as our first black president (although that fact in and of itself isn't really the miracle, it was, after all, only a matter of time) will begin to take office. The miracle is that this man has the power to unite us in a way that has not been seen in decades, behind a common purpose and toward a better future for a country that has lost its way recently.

I am truly optimistic and full of glee as I prepare for bed tonight (oh, bullshit, I'm going to stay up all night and watch post-election yumminess).

Imagine, my 18-month-old son Riley will grow up in a world where it's just "no big deal" for a black man to be president, but, even more importantly, a man who stirs us to action and inspires a renewed respect for those who choose public service.

I have always considered myself to be truly blessed to live in this wonderful country, flawed as it may be, but tonight I am more than proud...I am happy to be here. And looking forward to tomorrow.

Christ, I hope he's as good as I think he is. Lol.

Good enough, I guess

2008-06-12T03:23:00.004-04:00

Well, it only took me four airings of the Top Chef finale to catch the whole thing tonight. (While it can sometimes be an annoyance that every station on cable often plays the same show 10 times a day, times like these I appreciate it). The first time it aired at 10 p.m., I was busy getting children bathed and in bed. The first half of the second time, at 11 p.m., finishing the aforementioned tasks. At the very popular 1 a.m. showing, I had, of course, fallen asleep on the couch.

Each time, I caught tantalizing scenes, bits and pieces, really...who would win? The earnest-yet-slightly-offputting Stephanie? The ultra-talented mega-dork Richard? Or the horrendous bitch from hell Lisa?

Finally, I woke up with the strange sensation to do laundry...or have a cookie, I don't know. But, miraculously, I was able to catch most of the 2 a.m. showing...ah, heaven.

Richard tanked it (damn!), and it appeared to be neck and neck between the chicks. I had a horrible pit in my stomach...tell me that bitter nasty lesbian Lisa isn't going to win, please! (No, I don't care she's a lesbian, but I care if she's a bitter nasty one). Finally, in what has to be the most anti-climactic ending of Top Chef ever, Stephanie was crowned. Phew! Lisa the Troll didn't win! I suppose I would have preferred it had Richard won, considering how many times Stephanie was in the bottom three during the season. But, good enough, I guess.

Dale should have been in the final four, and that is still bullshit. But, thank God they didn't do another stupid live finale announcement. That was retarded.

Oh, and I folded laundry and didn't have any cookies. Yay, me.

Get a Clue, Bitch

2008-06-05T00:32:00.002-04:00

Okay, I'm going to keep this short and sweet...Hillary. Get the fuck out!

You've lost. We don't want you to be president. We voted for Obama. You are the sorest loser in history, except for maybe Mike Tyson. This whole thing smacks of desperation...the kind of desperation that usually a woman exudes, unfortunately. You know, a fixation on that certain guy, or the usual crap we tend to find important. But, really, honey, you need to get over it.

Not only that, we don't want you to be vice-president either. Because, no shit, I would worry about you hiring someone to take him out so you could be president. I am only half kidding about this...she would at least consider it...scary. You know what they say, "Hell hath no fury..."

And all you old Gloria Steinem chicks, still jonesing for a good old-fashioned feminist fix...you also need to get over it. It's about the best PERSON for the job, period. When we do have our first woman president (I'm hoping for 2016)...it won't be a Clinton.

Gonna take a moment to be all enthusiastic about the pending Obama nomination...and also to bitch about Lisa the Mean Unpleasant Lesbian making it to the finals of Top Chef...just can't stand that woman.

Jack of all trades...part deux

2008-03-27T00:52:00.003-04:00

I am simultaneously inspired and depressed...nothing unusual for the daily routine of my life. Tonight, Jen Chapin, the daughter of Harry Chapin, gave a small "house concert" at the Salem Elks, of which I am the manager. I am not actually cool enough to know the term house concert, but a 70-year-old man (musically oriented) acquainted me. She was FABULOUS...although, I am not sure if she would be as fabulous to a musically-educated and more sophisticated crowd, but I suspect she still would be.

It was a chance kind of thing...an Elks member, formerly a resident of New York and a retired music teacher (with a college music student), organized the small informal event, renting our small grill room as a venue for the occasion. I watched in silence as she lived my dream life for me...huskily crooning out her own original bluesy-folksy compositions as her husband skillfully plucked the bass something or other (looked like a funky cello) and the other middle-aged gentleman (I searched for the right word here) PLAYED (get it, ladies?) the electric guitar. They did mostly songs of her own composition, then, pushing her new CD, a cover of several wonderful artists.

Afterwards, I could not wait to talk to her. A couple of her songs were somewhat about being a new mother in her mid-late 30's, as myself. And, I was seriously jonesing for her to come back to Ohio and perform in my mother's art festival in our small yet hopeful town. (And by hopeful, I mean me and my mother, silly (no, godammnit, not silly) Obama supporters...lol.) Jen, who has volunteered for his campaign, said that it was in the bag...lol. I sure hope so.

I wondered why I had a feeling of being starstruck by this person. Was it was because I recognized her father's name? The Cat in the Cradle, admittedly, is an all time favorite song of mine, and yet, I am so lame, I could not name another song her father did (hold on, what about that one about the sinking ship, or was that Jim Croce, see how lame I am?)

I think what inspired (and depressed me) is that she is not any more priviliged than I, not any more intelligent than I, not any more possessed of familial love and support, but somehow, she has done what I haven't the courage to do...lived beyond the fear, beyond the need for approval, beyond where most of us go...on the road. Encountering love and support along the way, sometimes disapproval and condemnation, but maybe, just maybe, a belief in the value in one life so spent. A belief in touching one person, who touches another, etc., blah blah. In theory, it is a life I could have performed (a word carefully chosen), but yet not been able to tolerate. I have the utmost respect and admiration for a life I am not capable of choosing, yet even in my middle age (approaching 40) dream of experiencing for myself...and my 11-month son.

Because, whether it be visual arts (my mother's forte), or the written word (my brother's), or music, or any other art form (at time's everyone's life is an art form, the art of surviving or going above and beyond), I take my hat off to you, artists...one and all.

Ahhh, and yet, I am mildly depressed and jealous. But, I'll get over it tomorrow when I have enough money to buy my baby's formula and hold him, and tell him he can be anything in this world he wants to be...any mommy will follow him on the road.

Functional?

2008-03-05T00:12:00.002-05:00

I came home drunk tonight.

Let's be honest, it's not the first time I've done that, since I gave birth to my son 10-1/2 months ago. (wow, I had to backslash and retype a lot of that). But it's the first time I made a total ass of myself by sharing it with both my brother and mother by calling them. I have no excuse. I simply stayed too long at my place of business...I am a bar manager. I comfort myself with the fact that I don't drink anywhere else, I simply "work over." But let's not kid ourselves. Half the time, when I do that, it's because I have decided to let myself "unwind." Nine times out of ten unwinding constitutes itself in a couple of beers, which many times is in the pursuit of opinions of my members (I work for an Elks lodge, one of the last bastions of Republicanism, for which is half the reason for my buzz tonight...blah, blah, blah, excuse).

Oh, bullshit, I have always been willing to sit and have a few beers with anyone who had ANY opinion the same as mine, I am in the minority, a liberal democrat in suburban--and I use the term loosely--Ohio. Nope, not even us middle-aged (I still consider myself young at 39-1/2) democrats could carry the state for Obama)...I am...DEPRESSED. But, that is still all an excuse, I simply don't care enough about my son and 3-1/2-year-old step-daughter to be sober every day. What is sober? Sober is anything less than one or two drinks every day. (NO, I have no fucking idea what the goddamn Alcoholics Anonymous' definition is...but, for me, sober is not drinking every day. But, lately, I do drink every day.

Mostly, it's two. Over a span of the whole day. On the weekends, it's three to four in a night, over several hours. But, is it all relative? Am I raging alcholic? Are my brother and mother in denial? Am I berating myself unnecessarily? (Keep in mind how many times I to retype this.)

Can I possibly instill in my child and step-child (I realize I'm scum for delineating them, there should be no difference) the values I've been taught?

Am I just whistling Dixie? LOL.

Oh, fuck it, I need to pass out. Oh, woe is me, you should have heard the shit I put on my brother and mother tonight...a whole riff about how I should have protected my baby (he's 39 now) brother against the world's evils, and how I am not as perfect as my sainted mother (luckily, she's only 60). Wow, I was on a drunken roll. I only wish I had been truly talking out my ass as they told me...I believe everything I said was accurate..but, alas, they only heard the booze talking. That doesn't make it any less true.

If I was a good mother, I would have blogged about the fantastic things my baby did today, but I wasn't here to see them...I was at work. Then I got drunk.

Child Endangerment...i.e., Holy Shit It's Been Three Months Since I've Blogged!

2008-02-20T20:45:00.002-05:00

I suppose the only person I have to apologize to is my brother, since he is the only one who ever reads this stuff, but, just in case, I apologize to anyone else who waited with bated breath for my next post.

The child endangerment reference in the title is due to the fact that, while I am finally taking the time to write something, it's possible my 10-month old will be falling and getting a concussion or chewing on a power cord...oh, well, sometime's you have to take those chances.

J/k, folks, he's 10 feet away. Not that it can't happen when you're only 10 inches away, goddamnit.

But, honestly, as any parent will tell you, it is hard to get anything done other than work seven days a week (I usually work three days about an hour and four days about 8 to 11 hours), keep the house clean, the kids fed and bathed, laundry done...blah, blah, blah. If I am up late at night, it's usually because Riley won't sleep or because I have housework to do. After that, who wants to write, I just want to sleep!

Jesus, I'm boring myself.

Shit, if I don't have the poor overworked parent riff going on, what will I write about?! Think, Meg, think.

Well, let's go with the obvious...Lindsey Lohan channeling Marilyn Monroe for those pics in...blah, blah, whatever magazine it was...some people are upset about her hubris (sp?) for daring to imitate the 50s icon. I am as well, but not for the same reasons. I am not insulted for Marilyn...let's face it, she was no brain-trust either. And, they do seem to have similar taste in prescription drugs. No, I think what pisses me off the most is that Lohan would dare to put herself on the same par...fame-wise, popularity-wise, and just plain likeability-wise.

At least Marilyn had a certain tragic vulnerability and insecurity, as opposed to Lohan's self-indulgent arrogance and misguided belief in her own relevance...which, I think I can safely say to her...is nil.

Ok, that's covered.

Well, I'll just have to save some of my other tidbits for my next blog...say, four months from now? Lol. And by saying save my tidbits, I mean, Jesus, what am I going to write about next time, I barely could think of anything this time.

Jack of all trades...you know the rest

2007-11-16T03:48:00.000-05:00

It's late. I'm watching fox movie channel...they are interviewing the director (I think) of the last Die Hard flick...whatever, who gives a shit...I'm assuming it sucked.

He's going on about his creative impulse...I'm thinking, you know, any one of us could do that...it doesn't take much effort to be good at any job...just good, mind you. We learn the basics, apply common sense, use our own sense of style, whatever...any of us could direct a movie, tend bar, teach, shovel manure, whatever other jobs you can name...we could all do it adequately, even be good at it. But what makes us great? What separates us? What separates the Van Goghes from the local artists here in Salem? I believe it is a combination of things, events, or even luck.

Van Gogh was not appreciated in his time...should he be now? What makes his work of any more value or significance than another artist's? Timing, certainly. Propaganda, most definitely. I understand that Theo Van Gogh's widow was especially aggressive in her salesmanship of her late- brother-in-law's work after his death. A certain mystique due to his mental problems...the general attitude towards art at that juncture?

I am sorry, boys and girls, but I believe fame and fortune has a lot less to due with actual talent than with timing and placement...that's not to say we all aren't deserving, many talented men and women (the vast majority) will never be well known, and many more not make a dime off their life's work or their life's passion. I hope that doesn't diminish it's value, but, alas, I'm sure to some it will.

I myself very seldom feel the inspiration to create, mostly spending time trying to be "good" at what I do...but I will never achieve greatness...I fear that is reserved for those in the right place at the right time, with the right amount of inspiration (or obsession). I am struck by the example of Steven Spielberg. Not my favorite director, but one who created one of my favorite movies...Schindler's List...although, let's face it...it was kind of a no-brainer for him. Someone who created some good stuff...a couple of times, even great stuff, but, all in all, is he really a genius, really worth the bucks? No.

So, take from this what you will...my opinion that we are all capable of very good work...not often, and definitely in the right place at the right time...but great once in a while in our own way.

Good night, guys, my baby is waking up cause he's fussy that way...well, at least he's good at something for seven months....lol.

This Takes the Cake

2007-10-04T01:18:00.000-04:00

Okay, this post is specifically for those of us who are devotees of the Bravo TV cooking competition show Top Chef (all others can stop reading lol).

How gay was tonight's "live" finale?

What the hell? Did they actually make those three contestants wait an extra whatever-amount-of-time just so they could tell them who won in Chicago? Make everyone dress in the same outfits they had on for the final elimination challenge in Aspen? Gather an audience of fake fans and real family together in one place just so they could...what? Increase the suspense? No. Add to the drama? No. Irritate everyone with a bunch of canned applause? Yes. Add to the already laborious crap the contestants have to wade through? Yes.

This season ended up pretty good, although a few of the sponsored challenges (I refer to the absolutely retarded Bertolli frozen pasta and the Coldstone Creamery challenges) were completely beneath talented chefs. They even added to the fun by having famous and talented chefs serve as the sous chefs for the contestants' final challenge...Rocco Dispirito chopping parsley for Hung? Pretty cool. Only to ruin it with this lame-ass live portion to announce the winner.

And is Padma fatter on live TV than she is on tape? Just an observation.

Wow! My feet stink!

2007-09-16T01:52:00.001-04:00

So maybe starting a new blog at the same time I have a new job and new baby wasn't the most fabulous of ideas...

I'm sitting here bemoaning the fact that I don't have the best instincts for self-preservation. As a matter of fact, I have no instincts for it. I don't know how to "play the game" or be anything but what I am...a pathetic person who underachieved and is struggling to make the best of my $8 an hour job as the manager of an Elks club which has the most anal middle-class white self-satisfied yet uninformed prejudice ignorant closed-minded woefully sad people sitting swilling beer at $1.50 a pop (eat your heart out New Yorkers) and bemoaning the good old days when they had the drive to stay out until 3 a.m. (although I'm betting they had nothing more interesting to talk about then as they do now) and weren't wallowing in middle age playing pull-off tickets and wishing their penises still got hard once in a while and giving shit to the one person who is actually trying to attract someone new, anyone old, some people who want to have any fun at all to this actually quite unique and attractive old 1920s building to have some freaking good times!

Hmmm, free-association...not my strong suit. Just had nothing better to write about at 2 a.m. when I just got home after working 14 hours opening beer bottles for losers (of which I am one and never claimed to be otherwise).

The only other thing I felt like writing about (but didn't have time between working and falling into a dead sleep) is the possible scary shit with Putin dissolving the Russion government and them probably getting real cozy with China, who now has all our money and our jobs and could totally kick our ass (not that they couldn't before but now have even more power to do so since we taking it up the butt to them in trade and every other category.)...but another day when I'm more coherent.

My Hero

2007-08-29T23:51:00.000-04:00

Wow. I'm so bummed. My fair-haired affable anti-hero has, as Time Magazine put it, "a dark side." Turns out he's been hanging out with people who are bad influences, letting his self-indulgent side take control, pining over lost relationships, not taking the advice of of his stable younger brother, dabbling with mind-altering substances, shirking the duties of his employment, and just generally being self-deluded.

And, to top it all off, he goes to New Orleans and sheds crocodile tears for the second anniversary of Katrina...poor President Bush.

Wait, who did you think I was talking about?

Craig's List

2007-08-29T08:08:00.000-04:00

Senator Larry Craig, what are you doing today?

1. Joining the mile-low club.
2. Shoving a potato up my ass.
3. Voting to ban marriages between bald men who resemble aforementioned potato.
4. Engaging in actions "often used by persons communicating a desire to engage in sexual conduct."
5. Calling Tom Cruise for a date.
6. Pleading guilty because it sounded like a good idea at the time.
7. Blaming my hometown newspaper for misquoting and misinterpreting the statements of 300 people...all liars.
8. Assuring my wife, "I am not happy, I have never been happy."
9. Offering to perform oral sex on Mitt Romney.
10. Planning my bid for a fourth term...on the hypocrisy platform.

Place Your Bets

2007-08-22T07:09:00.000-04:00

So, I decided to look into getting Riley baptized. Considering my agnostic-at-best state, it makes me a hypocrit, but there is just nothing you won't do to give yourself a little more piece of mind when it comes to your child.

Hedging my bets, as it were.

Although I have always been preoccupied with fears of death and going to hell (odd for an atheist, yes?), since having a baby they have become more pressing, not so much because I'm afraid for myself anymore as I used to be, but because I want Riley to have his mommy as long as possible and believe she is a good person.

It's funny, but I guess I'm not prepared to entirely explain my thoughts on religion (I have always been fond of quoting Karl Marx on the subject...you know, the old "Religion is the opiate of the masses"...). Now being a mommy and wanting to believe the best about the nature of life and our purpose here (if there is one), I find myself wanting to be at least a semi-spiritual person. I certainly ask g(G)od for enough favors, everyday, in fact. So, lately, I have also been trying to thank him as much as possible...you know, just in case, because I wouldn't want to ask for things without thanking him...that would be rude, lol.

It's probably no use. My logical side tells me the whole thing is bullshit, that we are just globs of matter bumping into each other and effecting other people in randomly good or bad ways. But, just in case...

I'm going to get some tap water dumped on my child's head...and I'll probably feel better for some reason.

Lazy Bitch

2007-08-19T17:10:00.000-04:00

Ok, what's the surefire way to get everyone (all three of you, lol) to quit reading your blog?

Quit posting them!

Sorry, guys. I think I'll play the mommy of little baby excuse card on my 10+ day absence. However, the truth is I don't always have a good topic...like today's lame-o one...

Republicans' bullshit about our "welfare state" notwithstanding, why does our system have to be all or nothing? When my brother Joe was home, we visited a friend who had a story of a young mother who was on several types of financial aid apparently and who was pouring milk down the drain because she had too much and had to take her allotted amount every month, along with tons of expensive groceries...courtesy of the messed up system we have.

On the other hand, you have to be dirt fucking poor to get any help whatsoever...and I'm thinking specifically of aid for college or medical bill assistance.

Why can't there be limited aid, the amount and duration of which is based upon the family's particular situation? Is it any wonder why some people have to declare bankruptcy after a major ailment even though they had insurance while some people work the system and live it up?

I work full time (and then some) but have no insurance. When I was pregnant with Riley, I received a state medical card, and, I'm not going to lie to you, I fudged a little on my income. Not much, but apparently just enough. Also, even though Mike makes squat, if we were married, I could not have received the card because he has some very paltry insurance at work. With the card, I paid not a dime for any prenatal care or any care for Riley or myself since.

I have not abused it, however, I did get a couple of fillings done (although try finding a dentist who accepts the card, mostly hacks who are booked by other poor folks until 2008) and a cheap pair of glasses. A couple of months ago, I received a promotion and a raise (woo hoo). I have not been in a hurry to report it, and the people at DJFS are apparently so overworked that nothing gets checked on. I just received notice that I will receive the card for another six months. Don't worry, I will notify them of my raise soon and hope that Riley can stay on it for a little longer.

Now, there is something wrong with this. They are not monitoring people. However, although I make enough money to pay my rent, electric, and so forth, I do not make enough to pay for any health care costs above the occasional doctor's visit, so the card is the limited aid I need.

I am sick and tired of people (read: conservatives) decrying the possibility of socialized medicine, when that is precisely the kind of thing that should be socialized! Businesses providing goods and services for the good of the public health and welfare should have elements of socialism, such as reasonable price controls on medical services and pharmaceuticals.

Right now prices are not based on cost plus a reasonable mark-up...they are based on what the market will bear, where supply and demand intersect. Except where they intersect is also influenced artificially by the people and corporations with the most money. (My former macroeconomics professor would have a cow over this post.)

I have to go and take care of my son now, as I am typing with one hand with baby spit running down my shirt, but I will revisit and expand upon this issue, don't worry...or perhaps that should make you worry.

By the by, Master Riley Shane Philabaum turns 4 months old today!

Hotter than the Hinges o' Hell

2007-08-08T20:43:00.000-04:00

I'm stupid.

With two months of nasty heat, and the latest addition of major humidity, one would think that if my AC hasn't worked since we moved in (October, when we weren't aware of the problem) that we would have called the landlord immediately.

Nope.

I didn't want to be a bawwwwwwwwwwther. I didn't want to complain. I wasn't sure if we were responsible for the cost since we are renting on what is basically land contract (read your rental agreement, stupid). Well, as usual, I'm not looking out for number one, and it took the gentleman who found us the house to rent (a realtor I serve Coors Lights to on a daily basis) to say to me...."Why didn't you call Conrad?" (our landlord). He called and, within two hours, he was there with the repair people. A bad compressor...under warranty...be fixed in the morning when they get the part.

So, here I am, all summer, letting my baby suffer in the 80+ degree heat in our house, when all I had to do was pick up the phone. Instead, I did the typical Sweitzer thing, and suffered in silence like a dipshit. My Swiss grandmother always did say that "most men lead lives of quiet desperation." (I'm too tired to Google the original author of that famous quote.)

I will spend the rest of the evening with five fans trained upon my clammy, yet still quite adorable, child.

Best Laid Plans...

2007-08-07T22:07:00.001-04:00

Well, the heat and humidity have made for one cranky three-month-old in my house, so I have not had the opportunity to share any of my planned pearls of wisdom with y'all (and by "y'all" I mean my two loyal readers: Mom and Joe, lol).

I did, however, watch the last half of the Democratic debate in Chicago. It's a shame, really. I watch the candidates and become so full of hope........mostly because they're so full of shit.

But, let's fantasize for a moment, shall we?

Universal healthcare that doesn't compromise the quality provided and creates a never-seen-before concentration on preventative medicine and care.

A fair trade policy with China and other countries that safeguards American industrial jobs, but, at the same time, recognizes our new global reality.

An education system that fosters intelligence, creativity, and ambition among our youth, but doesn't use unfunded mandates and useless standardized tests to try to achieve those goals.

A secure country, relatively free from terrorist threat, and the (re?) creation of goodwill towards our government (and, thus, our people, because you can't separate the two in the minds of people in other countries) with a balanced and fair approach to foreign policy and our leadership position in the world, without our legendary hypocrisy.

An immigration policy that protects our citizens from possible security breaches and economic disadvantages, while allowing those who legitimately want to build a life here as Americans while maintaining their own cultural identity to do so.

To dream the impossible dream, to fight the whatever, whatever......I don't the fucking words.

I had the same reaction tonight that I had during the "youtube" debate: I wanted to smush all the candidates together to make one really awesome one (as I have often wanted to do with all my exes in order to make the "perfect" man).

But I came up with a better plan:

SISTER OF HAIRSHIRT FOR PRESIDENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mmmmmmmm.........beeeeeeeeeer.

Random Turds

2007-08-07T17:51:00.000-04:00

I will be posting several times this evening, as I am off work and looking for something to do besides ignore the plaintive screams of my children. (j/k)

Opening stupidity: When it's this hot and humid, why can't people invent clothing that doesn't actually have to touch your skin??

Mmmmmmmm.......Beeeeeeeeer.

2007-08-07T01:15:00.000-04:00

When people say they ran six miles, did they really run the whole time, was there really NO stopping? Did they keep the same brisk pace? Was their heartrate in "the zone" the whole fucking time? No cheating? No "power-walking"?!

People who exercise on a regular, or even semi-regular basis, are some of the most self-satisfied assholes on the planet. Where did the fun go? When did we decide we had to live forever? And, more importantly, when am I going to get my fat ass in gear?

I hate joggers.

Mmmmmm.......beeeeeeer.

I've Never Blogged

2007-08-05T21:18:00.000-04:00

So I'm a blogger now, huh? This should be completely lame. I have nothing to say about any topic, and, since I am a new mommy, most of my conversations are about poop.

Why in God's name am I doing this?

If I'm going to blog, I'll have to start paying attention to politics and the current social trends as I once did in my youth, when I was young and "plugged in." Not only that, I live in Ohio, rural Ohio at that...not exactly the hotbed of political and social activity.

Wait a minute!!!! By God, I am the Sister of Hairshirt! And I will find my voice! I will rise above my barely-over-minimum wage existence, my just-short-of-my-bachelor's degree status, my spit up formula wardrobe, my once-a-month sex life (never mind), my absolute strive for mediocrity! I will perservere!

No, I won't. I'll probably post a few mildly amusing, slightly informed, highly ordinary writings, decide I'd rather watch a rerun of the comedy classic "The Money Pit" for the 12th time, and then fall asleep with my dishes--and my ambition--undone and unfulfilled.

Ah, fuck it.